Wedding Planning? Keep the Traditions, Ditch the Mould!
Warehouse settings, vegan menus, sitting on the ground, doughnut walls, statement headpieces and cool gold necklaces, healing crystals, silent discos, face glitter – ‘trendy’ off-beat weddings are becoming much the mainstream these days. It is fantastic that couples are feeling comfortable to incorporate things they appreciate into their big days, after all, a wedding should be a celebration of your love and what better way to do that than make it as bespoke as possible…
However, your weddings may start to move dangerously close to copying or even worse, competing to be more ‘trendy’ or ‘unique’, than the weddings of your contemporaries.
Wedding traditions are often seen as passé, stiff, boring or unnecessary. This may be the case with certain rituals, for example, there is no point in having a formal seated 3-course dinner after your ceremony if you really want your guests to try your favourite Spanish paella or Chinese dim sum whilst floating and socialising between seating and dancefloor. But, if a tradition could suit you whilst also keeping granny happy and serving its purpose – no need to ditch it for the sake of being edgy and different!
As a London wedding planner, I like to really get to know my couples during the planning process; finding out their loves, their hates, what they do together on a Sunday afternoon, their holiday plans & what a good time means for them. This way I can give them endless tips and ideas – most of which hadn’t even crossed their minds – which are completely unique and makes sure that their wedding day totally reflects what they are about. I also keenly listen to any images they already have in their head for the day to make their visions a working and stress-free reality!
Here are a few starting ideas about traditions that you may like to keep in your day and how to shape them to suit you as a couple. But don’t let us professionals dictate the rules – keep thinking about how you and your partner would best celebrate your day:
Confetti is a bizarrely controversial topic in the modern-day wedding world: venues have banned it due to its excellent mess-making properties, the earth-conscious crowd shun it as waste (why not throw some plastic straws over the happy couple whilst you’re at it), the photographers despair about getting the perfectly-timed shot and bridezillas spend much too much time choosing what colour, shape and paper thickness will give the perfect flutter to the ground.
Millennials have started to blow bubbles, wave glow sticks or throw birdseed over the newlyweds and it’s all getting a little silly!
Tradition can take it’s first win here – go back to the age-old tradition of throwing uncooked rice over the couple. It can be swept up in no time, the eco-warriors shouldn’t disapprove too much, it’s inexpensive, any elderly guests won’t be baffled as they’re handed a bubble gun or a bag of birdseed and best of all, tradition dictates that it will shower the couple in prosperity and fertility (take what you can get!).
BRIDE & GROOM PARTIES
Recent wedding trend has put an end to bridesmaids and/or groomsmen. Perhaps it’s too cliché for the bride to have her girl gang walk the aisle with her or perhaps choosing certain people to be special is too much exclusion for a politically correct ‘millennial snowflake’.
But, it can be nice to have your dearest friends in bridesmaid and groomsmen roles. You’re grown-ups so at the end of the day no one is going to be offended if they’re not chosen – if they are good friends, they’ll just be happy (relieved) that you’ve found someone you love.
These guys will not only be near just before you walk down the aisle to give you a life-affirming smile or a last drag of your cigarette, they’ll be with you when you can’t decide which of your old school friends to invite, when you can’t find your pants an hour before the ceremony or when you just want to moan about how much your other half is annoying you. Above all and they’ll be with you during all the more tricky times that follow in your married life – looking out with extra special care for the both of you – never forgetting that you chose them to be close during the wedding proceedings.
…A last note here is that we are seeing increasing gender fluidity amongst the bridal and groomsmen parties and this is a good way to put a modern twist on the old tradition – to make sure you include all your closest friends – male or female.
A wedding veil is a magical door into the human wedding spirit. Put a veil on any bride-to-be’s head and you’ll witness even the baddest, most heavily inked, east London chic transform into a shining picture of all things good and holy.
The veil gets all in the wedding mood and nothing says ‘bride’ more. You can wear a cape or a fancy hairband any day but not a veil!
If you don’t enjoy the traditional long white lace look, don’t worry, there are thousands of beautiful takes on this headpiece, and designers relish the challenge to make a veil that suits each and every bride’s tastes. Flower crowns and bejewelled headpieces can still feature – and definitely should if you’ve found something beautiful – but they can be combined with a veil or worn later on at the reception.
Last and not least, the past few years have witnessed a huge rise in the wedding planning app and the DIY bride & groom. With a wealth of knowledge and tools online it’s now much easier to have your dream day whilst still arranging all yourselves.
This eliminates the need to have a wedding planner and so also the added expense of such a service. And, it’s easy to understand the reasoning behind this decision…
When wedding planners started to feature in the UK wedding world after their odyssey over the Atlantic, the weddings produced were either ultra-high-end for couples who wanted a workforce to take care of everything, provide 24/7 attention and create a sky’s the limit highly bespoke day – George Clooney in Venice vibes to give you a clearer idea. Or, they were planners linked to hotels or depressing banqueting halls who churned out endless copies of the same prawn-cocktail and Disco Dave tragedies.
But wedding planners these days aren’t always as people imagine. The fees can be much lower than you expect, the service is individual for each couple, your ideas are still King and you won’t be tricked into spending and choosing lots of extra elements that you’d never really wished for.
You’ll hear horror stories of couples going at it alone – little details are easy for the untrained planner to miss when you focus your attention to the exciting parts of the task…
You’ll hire that cool Reggae band who were playing in the pub when you first met but the invitations will be full of typos, you’ll have more guests turning up that the venue can hold or no directions leaving guests lost between ceremony and reception.
With the help of a wedding planner you’ll have fully-functioning invitations, the correct guest list and truly enjoy listening to the reggae band you requested as you won’t be worrying about when to ask the caterers to cut the cake or if the bus home will arrive – all will be off your mind leaving you to celebrate your love with your friends and family – the point of your wedding day!
If you are considering hiring a wedding planner please don’t hesitate to get in touch and have an initial chat about ideas and what you would like from a Love Made Me Weddings helping hand. We are totally flexible, provide weddings that allow the couple to enjoy themselves and days that truly reflect you as a couple.
Forget what the Joneses had at their wedding, celebrate your love, the way you like!